Well, that promise lasted long!! Ok, so I will TRY and keep this up to date. I am so, so, so shattered it's beyond belief tonight. My problem is the more tired I am, the less I can sleep. I have had so much to do tonight, just general things, emails, orders, sorting out my finances, although after tonight's orders.. what finances?? I think it is getting to be a bit too much to cope with at the moment.. Just starting to realise the cost of this venture, especially if I get more commissions, as this one is insane! AND I'm not doing it for any profit. BUT... I am certainly not implying I am regretting it! Not one jot!! It's just a lot to do on your own. Not sure how people who are self-employed cope! I have SOOO much to learn, and I will. I have been looking into grants tonight, well, that's what I am doing at the moment.. I need to get this thing moving properly.. I really must become a proper business woman. Ain't no one who is gonna do this for me.... Well, I never made the moulds I wanted to do tonight. The thought of mixing icy water for half an hour or so, did not appeal... partly because I had left it so late. Managed some emails to a couple of galleries I'm waiting on though. Then thought I'd best order the glass for this commission. Was handed a whole load of new designs today, which is why I wanted to crack on with moulds tonight, but with one thing and another.... The rest of today was a nightmare. Really unhappy with someone who I feel has stabbed me in the back, and I may forgive in time, but I don't forget. :( Tomorrow I am dreading as I was warned there is a film-crew coming in. I hate things like that. Thank goodness I'm in the shop, so won't be filmed all hot and sticky... !! So watch this space... may end up on "Britain's Most Wanted"!!.............

What a day. Spent all day in the shop, when all I wanted to do, was stick my workboots on, scrape my hair back and get hot and sweaty in the glasshouse.... Monday now. Keep getting fussed over because of my burns I acquired last week... if I have to utter the words, "It's only superficial, no biggie..." again, I'll scream!! Burns are part and parcel of my job. :) Hubby hates them, he thinks my hands are turning into bloke's hands. I don't care. I'm too busy being happy. I dragged him up onto the glassmaking stage one Sunday night infront of one of the furnaces, I wanted him to experience the heat I endure, he got about 3 metres away and couldn't get any closer. I said, "Hands like a bloke?" Now you know why. :)

Jewellerywise, I was so blinking bored, I managed to invent a pretty nifty tool which should cut my making stencils for sandblasting time by loads!! Things are plodding on quite nicely. Been given a project by a colleague, a pendant for his girlfriend, so I really want to make it lovely for him. Still ploughing through all the papers and comittees, arts councils, tradefairs etc... when I get a few minutes spare, which is not a lot these days. I think the help I was offered has changed it's mind unfortunately, but that's no big deal. I've worked too hard to let anyone mess this up for me now, but learned a valuable lesson, work and friendships don't mix. Especially when you are as stubborn as each other. I think it's easy for mates to take advantage, although I'm not accusing, just that I'm soft where they are concerned. It's added a little pressure, but I am used to that anyway. In fact, I work better under pressure. It's sad, but that's life. I've got this far on my own, I can't be carrying any dead weight. Especially when you are so desperately wanting someone to share the same enthusiasm as you, so I feel unfair in that my expectations weren't met. I know I can make a success out of this. I keep setting small goals, and it is a lovely feeling when you reach them. There is a craft shop I am determined to get into at the moment, I will persevere and eventually, who knows....
But for now, I am going back to printing off a little album of my work, a fabulous idea of my dad's who is a local artis too, and showed me one he'd put together today of some of his paintings. Perfect for taking around prospective outlets. Nice one Dad!! :)

My last attempt at a blog was pure personal whinginess, after a pretty screwed up year.....
All in the past now. This one is PURELY professional, a personal diary as I am setting up my own business. There'll hopefully be loads and loads of gushing about wonderfully exciting things, but plenty of whiny bad days too..



Not a fab start today.. this week I have done two days glassmaking for work and hell, have I suffered. A day off today, although I am ITCHING to get back in there. I SHOULD have been in there!! Thankfully I have a really high pain threshold so the fact I am covered in burns and blisters is no big deal. What is bothering me right now is the pain I am getting inside both wrists. I'm putting it down to pushing myself to the limit yesterday and the day before, but we got so much done!! It's weird, at the time I don't notice the agony, it comes later.. must just blank it out somehow. Common sense does tell you that if you are constantly infront of a 1400' C furnace all day, then it will start to sting at some point, even with the glass-makers telling me to take a break because they could see I was waning.

But that's 'proper' work. The rest of my time is spent working on MY project which is my kiln-formed glass jewellery. I set up really recently and I'm just getting going on it. The 'Big Push' hopefully get it into a few shops round and about. I just want to build up a reputation at the moment rather than focussing on money. I love making it. Everything about it makes me happy. I can't even begin to describe how passionate I am about it. I love seeing my ideas evolve and take shape and finally to be able to hold them in my hand is just the most amazing thing. It's important to me, because it is MY little private business. I can develop it as I choose, I'm so protective over it as only I know the amount of work I have put into this venture, and no one will screw it up for me. That way, if I fail, I only have myself to blame. But.. saying that, the support I've had so far has been amazing. So many people willing to help out in any way, loads of advice from them, really touching. I just want that big break, but I don't ever give up!! :)